Sunday, August 17, 2008

Being Alon Malkovich

As insomnia sweeps over me like the Mets vs. the Nats (yesss) here are some football things, in no order, that I've been thinking about (click More...):


  • Wait... the Saints still have Jason David as their #2 corner? Exsqueeze me? Baking powder? Jason David is so fun to watch because he is the most infamous defensive player of this generation and he actually lives up to it.
  • Reggie Bush is possibly the most athletic human ever created and he has the highlights to show for it (just check youtube). Unfortunately for Reggie and the Saints, he still only managed 3.4 yards per carry in 7 tries against the Texans.
  • Why aren't people higher on Michael Turner? The Falcons gave Warrick "3.2 yards per carry" Dunn 227 carries last season and Jerious Norwood 103. They clearly would've loved to run the football last season had it been an option... Well now it is! Since 2004, Turner's rookie year, in games where he has gotten 10 or more carries his totals are: 136 carries for 786 yards. That is an OUTSTANDING 5.78 ypc and if you don't think he is going to get at least 250 carries you are crazy. He is really sick. Look for the dirty birds to run the ball about 500 times this season. They didn't give "Burner" a six year deal for nothing.
  • Leinart and Warner are both NFL starting QB material. The Cards should go with Leinart because he is the future and they aren't going anywhere this season but if head coach Ken Whisenhunt starts getting pressured to win some games, watch out for him to frantically give the job back to Warner.
  • Edge looks determined to prove the critics that say that he is too old to be productive wrong, and I believe in him, however rookie Tim Hightower looks good too and may be stealing the goal line carries.
  • I haven't seen Larry Johnson much this season, and he did finish with good numbers in his last preseason game but in the few highlights that I did see he looked slow as hell. I don't know if I'm the only one, but from what I saw it seemed to me that he lacked the explosiveness that made LJ, LJ.
  • Steve Slaton not only ran the ball very effectively last preseason game but he also picked up blitzers like a vet. He's going to win the starting RB job, and he is going to be good.
  • It befuddles me how in 2005 we used a second round pick to draft Mike Nugent who is an average kicker at best.
  • I also cannot believe how strong Vernon Gholston (Geohlston) is as I now watch a replay of him shoving some Redskins player 5 yards out of bounds as if he was a 3 year old.
  • I've said it before and I'll say it again: Chad Pennington playing for the rival Dolphins against my Jets will test my fan-hood probably like nothing else ever will. Watching Chad carve up the elite Jacksonville defense was extremely pleasurable for me as I just want him to succeed.
  • Speaking of carving up the Jags' D, the Dolphins might have a very, very good running game this season if Ronnie Brown can make it back healthy. The reason I'm pointing this out is not just because Ronnie is so very sick, but it is also because Ricky Williams made the Jags' first team defense look like Swiss cheese. Ricky is back.

  • Their D can make anyone look bad, and a lot of teams look awful.
  • Hopefully we get to see Ray Rice lay out some high profile linebacker soon so people will stop posting clips of the Mo Jones-Drew + Merriman thing and because it would be awesome. I like him.
  • Oh yeah and their QB situation? Troy Smith looks extremely uneasy and flat-footed in the pocket to me, and Boller is Boller is Boller is Boller is Boller... if you know what I mean.
  • Man, I'm so sick of hearing about the new trendy pick for surprise team blah, blah, blah. The Bills suck. Marshawn is sick, but as a team they suck.
  • Trent Edwards' "dazzling" performance against the Steelers defense is overrated. He did most of it against their second team defense. I hope they go 0-16.
  • I love absolutely everything that I've read and heard about rookie WR Eddie Royal. The little bit that I have seen from Mr. Royal, I also LOVE (sleeperererereerererer).
  • Over/under on how many different teams Patrick Ramsey will have played on by the time his NFL career is over: 7.
  • Brandon Marshall is this years' Braylon (minus 2 games).
  • People get so obsessed with Jamarcus Russell's "nuclear bomb" arm (I couldn't think of anything stronger) that they forget about his 2006 LSU campaign. Russell finished '06 with 3129 yards, 67.8 completion percentage, 28 TDs, 8 INTs and 142 yards rushing in 13 games. He wasn't picked first overall to be a circus attraction, he was picked first overall to be a game-changing, franchise QB.
  • You know how in the Fifth Element the girl learns all of the world's history in a matter of minutes? I wish I could quickly do that right now so I could find someone to compare Chris Johnson to. He's the fastest kid alive.
  • Also rookie Lavelle Hawkins had a nice touchdown and I can't wait for his next blog post.

  • Richard Marshall's TD against the Eagles was the coolest thing ever.
  • Deangelo Williams is very underrated.
  • Their stadium is sooooooo cool and their fans are sooooooo loud. It's a shame that they will do nothing this year.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Reggie Bush is unable to run the ball forwards. He runs like 25 yards a carry, but only like 5 are actually forwards.